Rita Rudner Quotes

• There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Humor

  Tags in Introspective, Sarcastic

• The logic was, there weren’t too many female comedians, so I thought I might as well try a field that had fewer competitors than the field I was in, which was acting, singing and dancing.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Singing, Female

• My Vegas act is how I make my money.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Act

• My mother’s mother is a very tough cookie. She buried three husbands. Two of them were just napping.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Buried, Cookie

• If I say a joke and the audience laughs it makes me feel good.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Audience, Laughs

• I suffer from peroxide phobia. Every time I’ve gotten near a blond woman, something of mine has disappeared. Jobs, boyfriends… one time an angora sweater leaped right off my body.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Disappeared, Phobia

• I started taking ballet lessons when I was 4, and I was performing in ballet companies when I was 10, and I did summer stock in Miami Beach when I was 12, and finally I said, ‘I gotta go to Broadway.’

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Lessons, Broadway

• I love to write jokes and that’s all I think about.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Jokes

• I just love dogs, and there really is no better companion than an animal.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Animal, Companion

• I had no desire to be a stand-up comic until I decided to do it.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Stand Up, Comic

• I get so happy when I write a joke. It’s a very satisfying, liberating feeling.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Liberating, Satisfying

• I get a lot of return business. I think it’s all those years I put in traveling around the country; people saw me before and had a good time so they want to see me again.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Traveling, Return

• I don’t like when there’s too much conversation because I’m shy and it makes me uncomfortable.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Shy, Uncomfortable

• I don’t want to push the envelope. Let the envelope stay in the middle of the table. I’ll just make you laugh.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Envelope, Push

• When you’re a dancer, you start with the basics. You don’t all of a sudden do a grand jete and pirouette. You start with first position, second, third.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Sudden, Dancer

• Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Barbie, Identifying

• I’m a very simple person. I’m very shallow. Shallow, simple, easily pleased: that’s me.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Shallow, Pleased

• Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That’s how rich I want to be.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Humanity, Humor, Respect

  Tags in Want

• Men reach their sexual peak at eighteen. Women reach theirs at thirty-five. Do you get the feeling that God is playing a practical joke?

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in God

  Tags in Women, Feeling, Men

• Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage – they’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry.

  Rita Rudner

  Topics in Uncategorized

  Tags in Better, Marriage, Men

Rita Rudner (50)

Birth:	17th September, 1953
Nationality:	American
Profession:	Actress, Comedian, Writer

About

Rudner was born in Miami, Florida, the daughter of Frances, a homemaker, and Abe Rudner, a lawyer. Her mother died when she was 13. After graduating from high school at 15, Rudner left Miami and headed to New York City to embark on a career as a dancer.

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Births

• 1894 - Moshe Sharett
• 1925 - Angela Lansbury
• 1898 - William O. Douglas
• 1946 - Suzanne Somers
• 1953 - Martha Smith

Deaths

• 1969 - Leonard Chess
• 1946 - Wilhelm Frick
• 1793 - Marie Antoinette
• 1992 - Shirley Booth
• 1981 - Moshe Dayan