Jason Segel Quotes

You guys own the Muppets, and you’re just kind of sitting on ’em. I really love the Muppets, and I think I know how to bring the franchise back.

There were some super-lean years, yeah. I’m six feet four. And I entered into this period all of a sudden when I was too big to play a kid and I was too young to play an adult. Like, I couldn’t play the lawyer, but I couldn’t play the high school kid anymore.

Kermit was the Everyman, the original Tom Hanks, but I have a special place in my heart for Fozzie Bear. The classic borderline hacky entertainer.

If you can find the line between sympathetic and creepy, you have reached a very funny area.

I’ve just grown a little disappointed with ‘Muppets in the Old West’, ‘Muppets Under Water’ and all these weird concept movies. I just want to go take it back to the early 80’s, when it was about the Muppets trying to put on a show. That’s what I’m trying to bring back.

I’ve been 6’4” since I was 12. Goofy is somewhere in the lexicon.

I’m better looking in person.

I was making out with this woman, and my shirt was off, and she leaned over and, in a really cute, girly voice, went, ‘Hey, fatty!’

I sold my first script when I was 21 – this kids’ adventure movie that never got made. I just bought that one back, actually. I’m pretty psyched about it.

I have a similar issue with people who hire me as I do with women. ‘You have to have a particular taste to want to be around me. I have a slightly askew view.

I always have awkward relationships with the ladies for whatever reason. I don’t know and so here we are. I was able to sort of take all of those terrible, terrible, terrible dates and turn them into a money making venture.

Fozzie Bear has so many bear puns in this script – like, ‘Trac is grizzly!’ ‘This is unbearable!’ It’s the greatest.